An Apology Overdue

(You know who you are),

I know I should have acknowledged this a long time ago, but I'm sorry that I doubt you all the time. I'm sorry for telling you that you are wrong. I don't know when you lost my trust. I've mistrusted you for as long as I can remember.

I used to look at you and wonder what others saw. My mom told me you were beautiful. I didn't believe her.

I'm sorry that I was mean to you when you were a teenager. You tried to use concealer and blush to cover the red acne-bumps. I pointed out every single one. I looked at you. I said you weren't enough. I told you that you were ugly. My friends told me not to be so hard on you. I tried, but, the routine was second nature.

Like last week, when you told me what you needed. I said you were dumb and selfish for wanting more than you had. All you wanted was to be understood, but I didn't want to even look. I cared too much how others felt. 

I'm trying to do better... Please say that you'll forgive me. 

I saw a picture on Facebook last week. It was from when you were 16. We were at a party and you looked gorgeous. How could I have have thought you weren't enough?

I'm going to make it up. I promise. Next time I look at you, I'll look for the good. I promise. 

I'm done insulting the mirror on the wall.